The Free Indirect Discourse of Jane Austen

I tend to be a very black and white thinker, and I was told–as so many are in early writing classes–that an omniscient narrator is a bad idea. It leads to head-hopping; it’s old-fashioned; it’s not popular. Only attempt it if you’re a genius with literary aspirations.

And I’m not paraphrasing, that is exactly what I was told. I also tend to trust authority (more of that black and white thinking!) so it’s taken me years to realize that:

a) I desperately want to write this way and

b) it is (gasp) probably okay to do so. Carefully.

At the very least, there are no literary police who will come to arrest me if I try it. And some of you are probably laughing or shaking your heads about this, because… Duh, Jane Austen wrote entirely in 3rd person omniscient! She pioneered the use of Free Indirect Discourse. So why would I believe the first person who told me that it is a rule-breaking way to write and must be avoided at all costs? I don’t know. Your guess is as good as mine!

Anyway, I don’t think I’ve quite broken out of my enslavement to close-3rd point of view (a.k.a. 3rd limited POV), but gosh do I want to. I want all the perspectives and all the thoughts! I wrote one book in 1st person (my fantasy version of Jane Eyre), but even in that book, I couldn’t really stick to one POV despite the format of the book.

In every book since, I’ve written in “close 3rd” where you stick to one character’s deep perspective for at least one scene or chapter. If I change to another character’s perspective, there MUST BE a clear section break or chapter break.

But… I want to show so many characters’ motivations! Frequently. Briefly. In the same scene. I have multiple books now with climaxes riddled with section breaks to show POV shifts. It gets a little ridiculous. But what if there was a way to do it without such formality and choppiness? With free indirect speech, maybe?!

I’m not going back to change my previous books (I have a re-writing problem, so I cannot open that can of worms), but I’m looking at branching out soon.

(But seriously, if someone sees me pick up one of my older books with an editing look in my eye, you gotta slap that thing right outta my hands.)

In honor of my new goal, here are some of the most exquisite POV shifts in Jane Austen’s books. And by most exquisite I mean ones that I happen to like, not that there aren’t SO MANY passages of exquisite narration in her work that are arguably better.

Mr. Darcy, who was leaning against the mantel-piece with his eyes fixed on her face, seemed to catch her words with no less resentment than surprise. (The “seemed to” is still from Elizabeth’s perspective or narration.) His complexion became pale with anger, and the disturbance of his mind was visible in every feature. (This is straight up description, still Elizabeth.) He was struggling for the appearance of composure, and would not open his lips till he believed himself to have attained it. (he believed himself–this switches and we are getting Darcy’s perspective, briefly. It could be argued that this is still Elizabeth’s perspective, but I think that’s a stretch. She might guess that he would not open his lips until he attained composure, but she might also guess that he was processing or just angry.) The pause was to Elizabeth’s feelings dreadful. (Right back to Elizabeth.) At length, in a voice of forced calmness, he said,–
“And this is all the reply which I am to have the honour of expecting! I might, perhaps, wish to be informed why, with so little endeavour at civility, I am thus rejected. But it is of small importance.”

This is such a pivotal scene, and I love how she just dips in and out of Darcy to give us a glimpse of him! This whole interaction at the parsonage is great; that’s just one tiny example.

Or we could take the earlier passage where Mr. Bennet is telling them about his first visit to Mr. Bingley. We get Mary:

Mary wished to say something very sensible, but knew not how.

We get Mr. Bennet (most of the scene is his):

The astonishment of the ladies was just what he wished–that of Mrs. Bennet perhaps surpassing the rest

We get Mrs. Bennet (because she is the one who is finding the description unsatisfactory):

Not all that Mrs. Bennet, however, with the assistance of her five daughters, could ask on the subject, was sufficient to draw from her husband any satisfactory description of Mr. Bingley. (Italics mine.)

We even get Lady Lucas in a paraphrase of what she had said. The “delightful!” cinches that it is her view, not pure omniscient narration.

Her report was highly favourable. Sir William had been delighted with him. He was quite young, wonderfully handsome, extremely agreeable, and, to crown the whole, he meant to be at the next assembly with a large party. Nothing could be more delightful!

I know this is probably more detailed than we need to go, but since I am struggling to throw off the shackles of my close-3rd past, I have to analyze it at this level to figure out how to change!

Or this one where Elizabeth is tired of meeting up with Mr. Darcy at Rosings on her walks.

​More than once did Elizabeth, in her ramble within the park, unexpectedly meet Mr. Darcy. She felt all the perverseness of the mischance that should bring him where no one else was brought, and, to prevent its ever happening again, took care to inform him at first that it was a favourite haunt of hers. How it could occur a second time, therefore, was very odd! Yet it did, and even a third.

There is some objective omniscient narration to start, and a little bit of distance from Elizabeth with the “She felt…” but then it shifts decidedly into Elizabeth. The narrator already told us (earlier) about Darcy’s feelings, so we have suddenly dipped into her thoughts for it to be “very odd.” And, of course, the language and scene all flows beautifully while also engaging the reader (even if subconsciously) to figure out when something is just a fact and when we are getting character thoughts and opinions.

So much to learn! Wish me luck, and let me know what point-of-view you like to read or write?

Happy Thursday,
Corrie Garrett

(P.S. I have given close 3rd POV a hard time here, but I know it is a perfectly excellent way of writing! No judgement intended!)