Common writing wisdom of today says to stick with said, and maybe–if you’re daring–asked.
That just bugs me. The argument goes like this: said is a dialogue tag that disappears on the page to the reader, it allows them to flow through the dialogue like they’re hearing it. Sure, there’s a lot to be said for that. Taking the reader out of the story with weird dialogue tags is clearly a bad idea. (Like my past, innocent self who once used ‘ejaculate,’ meaning: to say or shout something suddenly. Ugh, I lived a sheltered life, okay?)
Past mistakes aside, I’ve always felt confident that today’s readers can handle a refuted, whispered, or asserted. There’s just SO MANY words in the English language at our disposal!
I knew Jane Austen, the queen of language, used words other than said, so I decided to do a little exploring. How much differentiation can be found in her tags? What are her common words? What’s the distribution? Here, I felt sure, would be justification.
To my UTTER DISMAY, she actually used very few! In fact, accounting for the time period in which she lived, she would probably be one of those who champions said!
I was betrayed; I was aghast; I was lost. I had been certain Jane would take my side.
Now, I’ll give the data below, but (spoiler alert?) Jane Austen does use incredibly rich language. Just not where I thought.
Okay, data time. I used a tool to count the words and then clicked through the manuscript and took out usages that were in the prose, such as, “[They] cried out against this injustice.” I only used instances such as, “‘And is this all?’ Elizabeth cried.”
Words used:
Said – 298 usages – 52%
Replied – 98 usages, or 17%
Cried (or cried out) – 87 usages, or 15%
Added – 51 usages, or 9%
And that’s most of it! The last 8% was a mix of: continued, 25, answered, 10, repeated, 6, addressed, 3, returned, 2, and whispered, 1.
I’m sure there were a few I missed, but basically over 90% of Jane Austen’s dialogue is tagged with 4 words.
What the heck, right? I’ve read this book so many times and I know there are more cues in there. We can hear Kitty coughing and speaking fretfully. We know Mr. Bennet is at times bemused or fatigued when he speaks. We know Mrs. Bennet is sullen or over-excited.
What I found is that Jane Austen uses her rich dialogue to describe the scene, the characters, and the conversation… but she does not use it to tag the dialogue.
For example:
Elizabeth, still more affected, was earnest and solemn in her reply; and, at length, by repeated assurances that Mr. Darcy was really the object of her choice, by explaining the gradual change which her estimation of him had undergone, relating her absolute certainty that his affection was not the work of a day, but had stood the test of many months’ suspense, and enumerating with energy all his good qualities, she did conquer her father’s incredulity, and reconcile him to the match.
“Well, my dear,” said he…
Here we have Elizabeth explaining, relating, enumerating, conquering, and reconciling… all the types of words I though I would find in the dialogue tags! But as soon as Mr. Bennet speaks, we are back to said. Alas, Jane Austen has convinced me. I will simplify.
On the other hand, another piece of modern writing advice is show, don’t tell. And I think Jane Austen will fully give us permission to ignore that one, as long as we strive to tell in such an captivating and brilliant fashion as she did.
Thanks for reading!
Corrie
P.S. Check out my Austen Ensemble books for more delicious dialogue.
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