“Show Don’t Tell” is B*!!$#1t – Just ask Jane Austen

According to publishers, writing coaches, editors, and English professors all over the world “Show, Don’t Tell” is a fundamental rule in storytelling. The underlying theory is that it encourages writers to immerse readers in their narrative through vivid descriptions, actions, and dialogue rather than relying on direct exposition of the characters’ thoughts, actions, and motives. This technique can make stories more engaging, characters more believable, and emotions more impactful. But what exactly does “Show, Don’t Tell” mean, and is it the only way to create engaging stories?

I’ve been messing around with this particular blog post for a long time. Nearly 3 years ago when I started on my publishing journey, I wrote the original outline of this but felt like I didn’t have any expertise to actually put these thoughts to print. If my books were a total flop, it would have been the height of hubris to poo-poo the only bedrock rule in publishing today. But now that I’ve got 2 novels out there and more than 5k books sold, I feel like it’s not fully ludicrous to comment on how much I disagree with this idiom, or more accurately, the application of this idiom in today’s editing culture and reviews.

At its core, I believe that the concept is to help writers create a scene that is full of different textures, details, and characters. The barest elements of any scene are the facts of what’s happening and the actions being taken along with the main characters’ reactions to those actions. But in practice, editors and critics use “show don’t tell” to try and kill all base descriptions of emotions and inner monologues, even when those descriptions are inside a longer description of the scene.

And sometimes, you just need to get to the point and move on.

Have you ever read a book that tried to avoid all direct exposition? I have, and they are not what I would consider great literature. Also, the showing kind of narrative is much more verbose than some direct exposition which, when paired with the general understanding that a novel should be under 100k words (another rule that a lot of the great authors fully ignore) , means that the story often ends up thin, like butter spread over too much bread.

Also, sometimes I just don’t need to know that much about the character. There are times when telling is far more efficient than showing. Summarizing certain events or information can help maintain the story’s pace, especially when the details aren’t crucial to the plot or character development. Take the following “showing” description of a main character’s morning:

“Elizabeth woke much earlier than the rest of the household, as per usual, and, after donning her front closure day dress without the help of a maid, spent some time at her correspondence before going down to the kitchen for a scone and apple to take on her morning walk.” – 50 words.

It’s full, and certainly paints a picture of Elizabeth’s morning. But is it really necessary? Was there anything of note in the correspondence? Is the walk this morning special? Do we really need get this much detail that functions as merely a bridge between waking up and getting to the important bit. Here’s a telling description that takes up much less space:

“Elizabeth woke early and, after her usual morning routine, found herself at the top of Oakham Mount before the sun was above the trees.” – 24 words

Less than half the above, AND now we’re ready to introduce the real scene which is some encounter with Mr. Darcy or Wickham or whoever at the top of Oakham Mount.

Exposition is necessary to provide context, background information, and explanations that help the reader understand the world, characters, and plot. Overloading the narrative with scenes and actions for every piece of background information can bog down the story.

Finally, the cardinal sin of “show don’t tell” purists ‑ character emotions. It is just the truth that there are times when the short direct explanation of emotion is actually more powerful than some showing description of emotion. Imagine after some devastating action or a hurtful dialogue exchange, say a botched and rejected proposal, the author provided the following:

“He wept.”

verses

“The tears came out silently and rolled down his face without permission. They tasted salty on his chapped lips and stung slightly.”

I can see, based on the general narrative style of the novel, going with either of these two, but the second is not obviously superior to the first. Effective storytelling often involves a balance between showing and telling. Understanding when to use each technique can significantly enhance the narrative.

I am not the first to write a blog post about how Jane Austen would not have made it past the developmental editor of a publishing house today. It’s often cited that her most famous opening line is a prime example of “telling.”

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.” – Pride & Prejudice

Our lady, the great Jane Austen also used a lot of telling all throughout her books. Austen frequently uses “telling” to introduce her characters and their traits. In “Emma,” she directly informs the reader about Emma Woodhouse’s qualities and circumstances:

Emma Woodhouse, handsome, clever, and rich, with a comfortable home and happy disposition, seemed to unite some of the best blessings of existence; and had lived nearly twenty-one years in the world with very little to distress or vex her.” – Emma

This direct approach quickly establishes Emma’s privileged position and sets the tone for her character arc.

Austen also uses “telling” to delve into characters’ minds, providing readers with direct access to their thoughts and emotions. In “Sense and Sensibility,” Elinor Dashwood’s feelings are explicitly stated:

Elinor was to be the comforter of others in her own distresses, no less than in theirs.” – Sense & Sensibility

Austen also takes an inordinate amount of time in other passages to describe everything about a scene. The trees, the smell of flowers, the sway of the carriage, fabrics, candle glow, corridor drafts, stilted posture, agitated  pacing, … … … It almost feels like there is no balance in her narrative style. Either she is telling you bluntly that

Mr. Darcy smiled.

or that

Darcy, in wretched suspense, could only say something indistinctly of his concern, and observe her in compassionate silence.

No in between. No compromise.

But maybe this is exactly why her stories are so compelling and her books are still in print today. She is uniquely herself. Reading her books or her letters to her beloved sister and nieces feels the exact same. She did not have one voice for herself and another for her novels. Austen created enduring stories and characters. She created a new genre of literature with realistic women’s romance, and she did it without following any of the modern rules of writing.

There are a million writers out there today, and I absolutely love that with the advent of self-publishing and e-books, more voices have been able to find their audience. But with that expanded field of competitors, it sometimes feels like publishers and reviewers are often punishing authors for their unique voice. A writer’s unique voice often dictates how they navigate the story and the rules of writing, including the balance between showing and telling. Some narratives benefit from a more introspective, expository style, while others thrive on dynamic, immersive scenes. The key is to use both techniques in service of the story, allowing the writer’s voice to guide the reader naturally through the narrative. The goal to creating art is certainly NOT to be a cookie cutter, Stepford wives, Pleasantville creator. Unless of course the story is a dystopian thriller.

Helping an inexperienced writer understand the difference between a showing passage and a telling passage is valuable to their development. And coaching someone who is writing only the barest of stories full of direct action, to direct action, to emotional exposition without any scene building will help them be better. But being a militant editor/reviewer about “ly” adverbs and the occasional, effective use of exposition is annoying.

Austen often uses direct exposition to introduce characters and provide social commentary while using dialogue and action to reveal deeper emotions and relationships. Her narrative voice is both witty and engaging, seamlessly blending show and tell. This is why she has persisted. Austen wrote art that 200 years later, after several major shifts in language and societal upheavals, still say something true and relatable about being a young woman.

My actual advice to anyone who wants to write, is just write what you feel is true. Don’t worry about the rules. If the story is good enough, the rules don’t matter. Just ask Jane.

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11 responses to ““Show Don’t Tell” is B*!!$#1t – Just ask Jane Austen”

  1. Alice McVeigh Avatar
    Alice McVeigh

    Great blog!! – but you’ve ignored a few elephants clogging up the room. The first is the mighty elephant of Stephen King and his over-influential book on writing. The second is the short attention spans of – sorry, where was I? Have to finish vacuuming – today’s readers (in comparison, say, to Dickens’ or Austen’s. The third is trad publishing.

    Between these three great galumphing elephants, it’s pretty generally accepted that you have to grab your reader by the ***** in the first ten words, show till your eyes bubble and forget every adjective and and adverb you have the misfortune to know. This is why so many writers’ “voices” SOUND JUST THE SAME. And yes, it IS boring, but – know what? – IT SELLS.

    If you dare to have an individual voice – which I happen to have, lol – agents will write you admiring letters and sometimes even take you on (I had a starry agent and Hachette as publisher once) – but will eventually dump you. Most readers aren’t up to it, is why. We’re all too busy and the industry has lost patience. Everybody’s chasing their tail seeking the next Colleen Hoover (who writes rather badly, in fact). Imagine living in an age when the talk in every lowly market stall and superior parlour was of the next instalment of Dickens’ or Wilkie Collins’ latest!!! (This really happened!!!!) Now, when 40% of Americans never open a novel after leaving college, it pays – literally and literarily – to follow the rules. Long books and long sentences only confuse the average reader. Sadly. (Sentence fragments do too, lol!)

    That’s why I love Austen: her style. And yes, she DOES tell as well as show – but so brilliantly that everybody loves it.

    So, I sympathise with your post and enjoyed reading it – but… the elephants.

    1. Alice McVeigh Avatar
      Alice McVeigh

      PS Greatly appreciate those who read on, to Amanda and other’s posts, btw!!!

  2. Amanda Kai Avatar
    Amanda Kai

    I feel that “show don’t tell” is a modern rule, and that older novels employed much more narrative-heavy “directly telling” styles. Both are useful techniques as you pointed out, and it can be favorable to employ a balanced strategy, especially when writing Austenesque fiction. Writing from a modern perspective, my books tend to be more florid than Jane’s were, but at times, I decide to cut some of the extraneous details and dialogue and summarize with a quick “tell” passage that conveys the same details and social commentary without taking up 2 pages.

  3. Regina Jeffers Avatar

    I was with Ulysses Press and Black Opal for 15 of the 24 years I have been writing. Ulysses was a traditional publisher who published my Austen titles, and I admit those first books were much “weightier” than my current JAFF. My latest publisher has a unique approach. It is author owned, but I do receive more in royalities if the book is, at least, 70,000 words. Perhaps that is the impetus for the lengthier passages. LOL!

  4. cindie snyder Avatar
    cindie snyder

    I agree! Jane does tell and show so well that you hardly notice. I am sure writing is complicated sometimes with all the elements in it but all you authors seem to make it work! You all have your own style.

  5. Glynis Avatar
    Glynis

    I’m not sure that I’ve understood this post but can I make the request that Elizabeth meets Darcy on Oakham Mount rather than Wickham? 😉 I actually like long books, favourites being those by Linda Wells and Cat Andrews so I must assume that I’m a big fan of ‘show’. I totally agree that authors should just write what pleases them.

  6. Riana Everly Avatar

    One of my biggest beefs is this idea that there are RULES for writing.
    Nonsense. There are guidelines for what works well some of the time. Yes, a book with all tell and no show will be rather boring, but as you said, sometimes we need to get some things out of the way to cut to the chase.
    It’s the same with backstory. Let it dribble out over time, the Wisdom goes. And that can be remarkably effective in many cases. But sometimes you just need to provide the context and move onto the plot.
    Great post and lots of food for thought!

  7. pamelafrancescaca6d65b4c7 Avatar

    Spot on! I’m speeding on with my effort taking up post Pand P and doing lives of Mary, Kitty Georgiana and Anne de B with three new men and there is no showing at all. The waspish voice is the one for me and i am employing it . it is enormous fun and if I had to waste time on endless actions/setting scenes, i’d become like Lady Bertram and have to take to the sofa. Pam Barnes

  8. suzanlauder Avatar

    Sorry, but this post shows you don’t understand showing.

  9. Gianna Thomas Avatar
    Gianna Thomas

    I think we need to use what works and that could be using show and tell depending on our story. Jane Austen did a marvelous job of utilizing the two.

  10. Steve Miller Avatar
    Steve Miller

    You won me over with the Title. I’m an “accomplished writer” who has attended Many Writer Critique groups for twenty-five years. They tend to always have some “Specialty Cops,” such as those who freak out and proclaim, “You Told! Look everyone, there on page 82 he’s Telling and not Showing!” Yet they don’t have a clue of the point of the story. My personal famous writings are all scientific reports for the military. My only big seller is my only children’s story where the text purely “tells” and the pictures do all the “showing.” I agree with Riana Everly’s comment that it’s unfortunate that we have so many Strict Rules for creative works. Notice how I throw in Capitalization in “unacceptable” places. That’s my way of doing emphasis when italics isn’t available. I told my writer friends that someday it will be standard. They bitterly admonish me for thinking such sacrilege. (And they say italics are generally wicked except within strict guidelines.)

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